Today my man and I are celebrating 28 years of marriage. Several times in the last couple of days we have heard something like. "wow, you don't hear of people being married that long any more. Congratulations!" And no, nowadays you don't. Satan is really doing a number on marriage.
For whatever reason, when we were newlyweds we made the decision that divorce just would not be an option. However, I told him that all bets were off if infidelity were involved. My 23 year old naivete thought that this was the worst thing that could happen in a marriage. I couldn't even begin to fathom the ups and downs as we started out.
I really wish that I could sit down with young couples who are getting married and have a little talk with them about marriage. I would tell them that undoubtedly, marriage is the hardest thing that they will ever do. And you think you love each other now, but you have no clue how that love will be tried and tested and grow exponentially over the years. And that the person that you are madly in love with can also be your biggest irritant at times. And unless God is present in your marriage, you can't do it on your own.
I would tell them that true love is your husband holding your hair back from your face while you throw up for the 100th time because you are pregnant. Or holding you in your arms while you both sob uncontrollably because you lost that precious life that you were carrying. Or holding hands while you wait on the results of a medical test. Or gazing in wonder into the eyes of your baby moments after you've given birth. Or holding each other as you bury someone that you love.
As my newlywed daughter is fond of saying, "love is a choice. You have to make the decision every day that you will love your spouse unconditionally." Wise words for someone so young. I would tell them that their marriage is hard, but it is worth fighting for.
Happy Anniversary honey. I love you.